


Positive

by petiteinsomniac



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: HIV/AIDS, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Modern AU, Nobody Dies, and a little bit of jason and dad!whizzer which we can all use more of in our lives, kinda sad but like not death sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 11:55:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15684945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petiteinsomniac/pseuds/petiteinsomniac
Summary: Whizzer blames himself for his and Marvin's diagnoses, but Marvin disagrees.





	Positive

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know. I just like whizzvin hurt/comfort. To the person who asked me for fluff, well... at least nobody is dying this time.

“Whizzer?” 

Marvin leaned against the doorframe and rapped lightly on the door as he spoke. He leaned in close to listen, hoping to hear an answer this time. However, it was all quiet in the bedroom on the other side of the door and Marvin sighed. 

“Baby, I’m coming in, okay?” he called. He received no objection in return so he turned the knob and stepped inside. He found Whizzer curled up under the blankets, as he had been for nearly the entirety of the two days since they’d received news of their diagnoses. 

HIV positive. 

It wasn’t what it had once been; it wasn’t a death sentence. In fact, Marvin himself wasn’t even particularly bothered by it. It was unsettling, but it wasn’t that bad. All in all, he counted them lucky to live in a time when such a disease was manageable. Whizzer, however, was taking it much harder. He had barely spoken to Marvin since they had left the doctor’s office, and he hadn’t eaten since. Now Marvin had spent the better part of two days worrying about his better half and best friend, and he knew it was time for them to talk. Whizzer couldn’t go on like this forever. He sat down on Whizzer’s side of their bed and rested his hand on Whizzer’s shoulder, atop the blankets. 

“Whizzer?” he said gently. “Aren’t you hungry?” 

Whizzer silently shook his head, and Marvin sighed. He’d known Whizzer was awake, but had still secretly hoped that he would find his lover asleep. Then it wouldn’t feel like such a rejection that Whizzer had ignored his calls for him. 

“You really need to eat,” Marvin said softly. 

“What’s the point?” Whizzer croaked. 

“The point is, I love you and I need you to keep yourself healthy,” Marvin answered, sounding slightly more desperate than he had meant to. 

“Too late,” Whizzer whispered. 

“Whizzer,” Marvin said gently. “That’s not true. HIV is not a death sentence. But not taking care of yourself is.” 

Whizzer turned to face Marvin, his eyes top to reveal a look of hopelessness and fear in their brown depths that was painful to Marvin. 

“Do you hate me?” he asked, and as he watched, Marvin’s face fell. He could feel his stomach drop at the words that Whizzer had spoken. 

“What?” he asked. “Baby, what are you talking about?” 

“I gave it to you. We both know I was the one sleeping around when we were broken up, not you. I’m the reason we’re both sick.” 

“Oh, Whizzer, no. Of course I don’t hate you,” Marvin answered. He reached out and gently tugged at the blankets. Whizzer resisted at first but ultimately gave in and let Marvin expose him a little bit. The latter ran his fingers through Whizzer’s hair, which was currently dirtier than Marvin had ever seen it after two days in bed. 

“Baby, this is not your fault,” Marvin said. 

“It is,” Whizzer argued. “It is my fault, Marvin. I’m the reason that you have to deal with this for the rest of your life. I’m the reason you’re sick, I’m the reason that we always have to worry and every little cold is going to be something scary. I’m the reason that we have to tell Jason-” At the mention of their son, Whizzer’s voice broke and he began to sob in earnest, struggling to catch his breath. 

“Hey, hey,” Marvin soothed. “Baby, come here. Come here, it’s okay.” 

He settled in beside Whizzer and pulled him in close; finally, Whizzer relented and let him, curling himself against Marvin’s chest. 

“I’m so sorry,” he cried. “I’m so sorry, Marvin.” 

“Shh, shh,” Marvin soothed as he cradled Whizzer against him. “It’s okay. It’s okay. Just take a breath for me, okay? It’s alright.” 

He rubbed Whizzer’s back as he spoke, his voice calm and even. 

“I didn’t mean to- I never meant-” 

“Whizzer, it’s not your fault,” Marvin insisted. “It’s okay. There’s nothing to be sorry for.” 

“I got you sick. Something could- you could die and-” Whizzer took a shuddering breath, but continued before Marvin could speak. “You could die and it would be-because of me,” Whizzer rambled. “I could lose you and it would be all my fault and then Jason would hate me and then I would have no one left and-” 

“Okay, okay,” Marvin interrupted. “Darling, I need you to stop talking and breathe. Okay? Just take some deep breaths, because I need you breathing, okay? Can you do that for me?” 

Whizzer took a breath, but he didn’t stay quiet for long. 

“I could lose-” 

“No,” Marvin argued. “No, honey, you’re not losing anything. You’re not losing anything. I’m going to be just fine; we both are.” 

“You should be leaving me,” Whizzer sobbed and Marvin held him more tightly at the memory of kicking Whizzer out and the loneliness that had followed. 

“Never,” he vowed as he pressed a kiss to the top of Whizzer’s head. “I couldn’t.” 

“Please don’t leave me,” Whizzer whimpered. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Marvin sighed against his hair. 

“Please, Marvin,” Whizzer pleaded, and Marvin shook his head. 

“No, no, of course not,” he soothed. “No. I would never leave you, okay? I promise. I’m right here, darling. It’s okay.” 

“I didn’t mean to get you sick,” Whizzer sobbed. “I’m so sorry.”

“I know,” Marvin assured him. “Hey, listen. You’re here with me, and we’re both going to be just fine. We’re going to watch Jason grow up and graduate and maybe get married and then maybe someday he’ll have kids and then we’ll be grandparents. And we’re going to do all of that, and everything else, together, which is all I could ever ask for. If I have to take pills for the rest of my life and be careful, so be it. That’s nothing in the grand scheme of things because I have you at my side and Whizzer, I would gladly give anything for that. Alright?” 

He ran his fingers through Whizzer’s hair and spoke so gently that Whizzer was simultaneously comforted and weepy. 

“So you don’t hate me?” Whizzer managed through his tears in a small voice. Marvin chuckled lightly, not at all in a degrading way but something more endearing by a long shot. He kissed Whizzer’s forehead tenderly and tilted Whizzer’s head back so that their eyes could meet. 

“I promise I don’t hate you,” he said seriously. “I love you, Whizzer, more than anything. Everything is going to be okay.” 

“I love you,” Whizzer choked as he returned his head to the crook of Marvin’s neck. Marvin cradled Whizzer’s skull against his palm and threaded his fingers through Whizzer’s hair. 

“Thank you for not leaving,” Whizzer breathed. 

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Marvin swore. 

“Come on,” he said softly a few minutes later. “Let’s get you something to eat, yeah? We’ve both been worried about you.” 

“Both?” Whizzer repeated. “You and who?” 

“Baby, it’s Saturday,” Marvin said gently. 

“Oh god, Jason,” Whizzer groaned. “I forgot. I feel so awful, how could I have forgotten Jason?” Tears were threatening again and Marvin quickly shook his head. 

“Baby, it’s okay,” he soothed. “He just thinks you’ve had a virus. He’s not upset with you, I promise.” 

“He’s still here?” Whizzer asked. 

“Yes, but he’d fallen asleep in the living room when I came in here. He’ll be thrilled to see you. He’s been texting you, but I told him you hadn’t been checking your phone.” Whizzer glanced over at said phone, which he hadn’t touched in two days. 

“He doesn’t text me,” he said. “He Snapchats me.” 

“I don’t know what that means,” Marvin admitted, and Whizzer let out a watery laugh. 

“Do you think he’s mad at me?” Whizzer asked innocently, looking anxiously over at Marvin, who smiled slightly and kissed his lover gently. 

“No. He loves you almost as much as I do.” 

Whizzer couldn’t help the tiny smile that graced his features at that. 

“Almost?” he repeated. 

“Mmhmm,” Marvin hummed. “Come on. We’ll figure out how to tell everyone later. Right now, let’s get you something to eat and you can see Jason. Then later after Jason’s asleep, we’ll have a bath together, how about it?” 

“You do know how to reel me in,” Whizzer admitted and Marvin grinned. 

“I’ll even wash your hair for you,” he promised and was rewarded with a smile that made his heart leap in his chest. As the two of them made their way out to the living room, Marvin squeezed Whizzer’s hand in his own. 

“Jason,” he called. “Someone wants to see you.” 

Jason glanced over the back of the couch and Whizzer watched his eyes light up as his face broke into a wide smile. 

“Whizzer!” he exclaimed enthusiastically, and seconds later he had bounded over the back of the couch and into Whizzer’s arms. Whizzer laughed and held Jason close, swallowing the lump in his throat. 

“Hey, kid,” he said. 

“Are you feeling better?” Jason asked, and Whizzer smiled at him. 

“Much better,” he admitted honestly. 

“Great, now you can eat pizza with us,” Jason said quickly, and as Whizzer looked over Jason’s head at Marvin, smiling tenderly at the both of them, he couldn’t help but smile, too, because it was just as Marvin had said- they were all together, and that, in the end, would be all that mattered.


End file.
